When Harry Met Sally
Why me? Sometimes it is all too difficult.
Such is the dearth of decent, normal, healthy human beings out here that I am happier to pin my hopes upon a non-existent (my heart breaks!) book-character who's gender is in question, then any real-life offers.
Am I so naive to expect a male and female can be just friends? Can a woman go out with a guy without having to defend her honour and sensibilities?
Apparently not.
One "no thanks", evidently means "try me later".
You agree to go out once, as a nice evening between friends/new aquantences, for conversation and a night out (and an agreed "there is nothing more" , shake hands as you leave, never speak to each other again for 18months, until work requires it, then you get a "we should catch up". You say Ok (like catch up's ever happen, or else over coffee with lots of people around). Then the next day you get a "here's my address be there at 7 tomorrow night".
Right.
'Cos I am in the habit of going over to strange men's (one outing 18mnths ago isn't enough for me to 'know you') home on a friday night, for 'a surprise'.
What sort of person do people take me for? Do they think I would happily do that? Especially when they already said "don't worry, you won't need to put '000' in your mobile phone". What the hell was he expecting from me?
I intially said ummmm, ok, 'cos a) of the way he phrased it, and b) I had customers about to arrive. And if I am honest: c) I panicked. I hung up the phone and went "Oh fuckfuckfuckfuck" under my breath.
So after a very worrying and anxious night, and support from my c0-worker I rang him up the next morning, cancelling. No excuses. I don't need to explain myself.
I felt so free afterwards. I didn't realise how anxious I was until it was gone, all that weight and worry.
And really, it wasn't so much a matter of personal safety, but expectations, motivations (I am suspicious perhaps) and the fact that, I didn't want to. Some people wouldn't mind going over, and would have a fun time. Not me.
Which is reason enough not to go. I don't ever have to do something I am not comfortable with.
It would have been easier to say no in the first place, but well, it was the way he said it, and besides, next time I will be better prepared.
We learn something everyday.
(I have always been more curious than wise. That's why Beloved and I would be a match made in heaven)
Such is the dearth of decent, normal, healthy human beings out here that I am happier to pin my hopes upon a non-existent (my heart breaks!) book-character who's gender is in question, then any real-life offers.
Am I so naive to expect a male and female can be just friends? Can a woman go out with a guy without having to defend her honour and sensibilities?
Apparently not.
One "no thanks", evidently means "try me later".
You agree to go out once, as a nice evening between friends/new aquantences, for conversation and a night out (and an agreed "there is nothing more" , shake hands as you leave, never speak to each other again for 18months, until work requires it, then you get a "we should catch up". You say Ok (like catch up's ever happen, or else over coffee with lots of people around). Then the next day you get a "here's my address be there at 7 tomorrow night".
Right.
'Cos I am in the habit of going over to strange men's (one outing 18mnths ago isn't enough for me to 'know you') home on a friday night, for 'a surprise'.
What sort of person do people take me for? Do they think I would happily do that? Especially when they already said "don't worry, you won't need to put '000' in your mobile phone". What the hell was he expecting from me?
I intially said ummmm, ok, 'cos a) of the way he phrased it, and b) I had customers about to arrive. And if I am honest: c) I panicked. I hung up the phone and went "Oh fuckfuckfuckfuck" under my breath.
So after a very worrying and anxious night, and support from my c0-worker I rang him up the next morning, cancelling. No excuses. I don't need to explain myself.
I felt so free afterwards. I didn't realise how anxious I was until it was gone, all that weight and worry.
And really, it wasn't so much a matter of personal safety, but expectations, motivations (I am suspicious perhaps) and the fact that, I didn't want to. Some people wouldn't mind going over, and would have a fun time. Not me.
Which is reason enough not to go. I don't ever have to do something I am not comfortable with.
It would have been easier to say no in the first place, but well, it was the way he said it, and besides, next time I will be better prepared.
We learn something everyday.
(I have always been more curious than wise. That's why Beloved and I would be a match made in heaven)
posted by Bright Tiger | 8:46 pm
1 Comments:
well, yeah, not easy situation. The problem is i think, that we women (or some of us actually) don't really manage to "decipher" the codes some are said to be existing. Always was my problem, never knew what the signs meant. Or perhaps we're assuming and expecting too much of men brains? that's also a possibility.
I don't very much believe in real deep and honest friendship between a man and a woman. Somehow, one or the other will always think about sex one of these days. Even if the things were straighten right in the beggining. mmmmmhh well.
The problem is that we, women, are thinking too much. Men don't.
Methink..
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